Kai, the Hatchet-Wielding, Homeless, Surfer/Hitcher. Defies description so such watch. "Club him in the head with a hatchet?" Gnarly. "I'm like bro, if you're Jesus Christ then I'll be the Anti-Christ." Here's the full NY Daily News headline: "A California utility worker's leg is crushed by crazed 290-pound 'Jesus Christ,' who is then hatcheted by far-out drifter after trying to hug woman bystander to death." And, now, of course, there's an auto-tune tribute.