The Nazis find me

It’s not every day you receive in the mail (unsolicited, trust me) an American Nazi magazine, and a glossy one to boot. There’s a reason I was targeted to receive it, which I won’t reveal right now. But I can say that the cover promises an expose of “devil worship, communism and faggotry” – right under the logo, which features a swastika.

The magazine is called National Socialist, the “Journal of the American National Socialist Workers Party.” Since it has socialist in the title Jonah Goldberg will no doubt label it "liberal fascism." It’s the January 2008 issue and its cover price is $8 (imagine the newsstands that might carry it). This is a pretty hefty price for an 18-page issue, but like I said, it’s glossy, is printed on heavy stock and in full-color. On its contents page it claims a “first printing” of 3000 copies.

There’s one full-page ad: For a Republican running for Congress in Illinois. A smaller ad for a news network promises, “No Jews. Just Right,” and another outfit hawks “rare videos” with titles like “The Eternal Jews.” Articles cover everything from “The Lubavitch Hive” to the link between Pearl Harbor and 9-11 conspiracies.

The people behind it are apparently proud of their work. The party’s “commander,” Bill White, who has sometimes stirred national controversy, is frequently touted, the magazine’s staff box includes a list of contributors and there’s a “Contact Your Local Unit” in the back, with chapters in 13 states listed under a large swastika. Each unit leader is identified with full name and address, email and in some cases, web pages.

Across from that: A membership application to join the party. Besides the usual contact information, they also want to know why you want to join and remind you of Article XII of its charter, which reads in part: “Party members…must be adults of white racial heritage and good morals, and at least 18 years of age.” It adds that this heritage “shall be defined as being able to trace seven of one’s eight great-grandparents’ ethnic origins to the Aryan peoples of the land now occupied by the following nations,” going on to list the expected nations, ranging from Iceland to Kosovo.

Other requirements include not having a non-Aryan spouse or even having sex with a non-white in the past five years, and of course “being heterosexual and without any public display of sexual fetish or deviance.” And also, “not being employed in an infamous profession,” whatever that means (the media??). But they do add that they will consider “exemptions.”

The application fee is only $50 but there are dues of $20 every month. Plus: “The black shirt uniform costs an additional $50.” (Please specify S, M, L or XL.) You also have to fork over $36 for a criminal background check -- and an “armband.”